I haven't been on here in so long. Every time I have something to write about, I get distracted or lazy. Distracted, because there are better, more important, stressful things that I need to be worrying about. Lazy, because I feel like I really don't need to logically think through things in my brain, and quite frankly, I don't want to deal with them.

And right now, I have homework to do. I have coffee to drink, and water to wash my throat with. But, I feel I just need to unload, if but a little, for the world to see.

Point #1: School. It is stressful beyond hell. I know that there are going to be some bad grades once the semester is over, and I am not excited. I just don't know. I feel like I just keep sliding further and further down the hill, in the fact that I'm just caring less and less about school. I don't want to be here. I don't want to do this. But I have to. And it's not motivation enough for me to do well.

Point #2: My landlady hates me. I'm not cleaning the house every weekend, because I'm not at home enough every weekend to do so. Every other week, definitely; every week, hell no. And I just keep diggin' myself in this hole, because every other week or so is the same complaint. What-the-hell-ever.

Point #3: I have a crush on this boy. He's cute. He's a theatre major [and math double major]. And he's 18, and a freshman, but let's just look past that. He, I'm assuming, is also attracted to me. He needs to just hurry the hell up and ask me on a date. Or, if not, tell me he's not interested so I know whether to let this crush fester.

Point #4: I love University Players. I love the people involved, the places we go, the times we have together. Today, we were performing in The Dalles, two hours away. On the way back, I was sitting beside a boy who has a big space bubble. I fell asleep, and naturally, I leaned on him the entire time. And he didn't even say a word. Now, I'm all embarrassed and feeling all awkward and crap. Damn it.

Point #5: I have nothing else significant to write about. I just wanted to make another point. I'm going to go back to writing my journal for Drama in the Classroom, and reading for my Stagecraft and Understanding Drama class. I also have to write a mission statement for a fictitious theatre. Great.

I’d like to think of myself as a person who doesn’t judge. I hope that when I’m around someone, they know that I’m not judging them. That’s not my job. My job is to be as kind as I can possibly be to that person.

However, it doesn’t mean that I DON’T judge. I’m human, damn it! I judge people from the moment I look them in the eye. And then I remember, “Wait a damn second! What the hell? I’m not any better than this person!! Step away from the horse!”

And then I go on my merry way.

But I find that sometimes, there are people who refused to move out of the way. They keep bitch-slapping you with their stupidity, and then you're stuck with a headache. And I hate headaches.

I have a headache right now. Why? Because of the stupid opinions that some people have taken up. Funny thing is, all these people seem to live in the United States of frikkin’ America. These opinions have to deal with the speech that President Obama will be giving to Wakefield High School in Arlington, VA tomorrow [ his speech can be read at http://www.whitehouse.gov/MediaResources/PreparedSchoolRemarks/ ]. Now I have personally gone and checked this speech, just to make sure that he wasn’t trying to brainwash these kids into thinking he was Christ reincarnated... thus making him evil… thus worthy of being shot in the face before Jesus sends us ALL to hell.

AND HE WASN’T DOING ANYTHING BUT TELLING THESE CHILDREN TO WORK HARD IN SCHOOL FOR THE FUTURE OF THEMSELVES AND THEIR COUNTRY.

He was letting them know that in order to get out of the cycle of blameblameblame, we gotta start standing straight on our own two feet and work hard. Because if we work hard, then we can solve the problems in the world. Like cancer. And AIDS. And poverty. And stupid opinion-ism.

If you read it, it doesn’t look political. It looks as though this man genuinely cares about the children of this nation. He has two kids of his own, so you KNOW this man cares. He continuously tells these children to stay in school and work. He continuously tells these children that it's hard work, but to never give up.

And then you have people who are now going around stirring up trouble, saying that this man is trying “to foist a political agenda on children” [http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5ib8qja0qqnnbZFsHF7kP6GV9XVfQD9AG43GO0]. GOP chairman Jim Greer believes the President’s ideology is that of a socialist. Oklahoma state Sen. Steve Russell even compares this "situation" to N. Korea and Saddam’s Iraq.

And this is when my judgmental attitude comes in. Seriously? Telling children to work hard in school makes President Obama like Saddam Hussein?! You ignorant-ass, stupid mother-fuckers! Are you KIDDING ME?! Why does EVERYTHING in America have to be political? That’s like me going around and saying that every person who utters the word hi to me is a racist.

This really needs to stop. This freedom of speech has gone too far. I don’t think that the America today is the America the Founding Fathers had when they wrote the Constitution. I’m pretty sure if they saw the America of today, they would have written into the Constitution that every person who takes things too far has a right to be shot in the face.Then resurrected so they could be shot in the face AGAIN.

Please, go and read President Obama’s speech, and give me your honest opinion. Do you think that he was trying to prove a political point, or was he, as I think, just trying to get these kids to stay in school for the sake of themselves?

[I know that not all Americans are idiots, and so when I talk about Americans being stupid, I'm generalizing]

So I was at Coffee Cottage today, and I decided to sit outside and read Between the Assassinations [ARAVIND ADIGA] while I drank my coffee. I sat in the very corner of the very back. I opened my book and started reading for a little bit, then I had to go do something really quickly. A couple minutes later, when I came back, there was this guy [who looked to be in his 50s] and his son at the table next to me. As I sat down to continue reading, the guy looked at me and said, "Hey, thanks for stealing our table. We always sit there, and you took it from us."

I laughed, "Yea, well, too bad, because I was here first." He smiled and replied, "That table has our name on it. I can't believe you. We always sit there, so it belongs to us." "Sure," I said, "keep telling yourself that." He laughed, and sat down. His son, who had been running in circles, came up to me and said, "You know, we could share." His father called him over [he saw me reading, and must not have wanted him to bother me]. The son ran over, stood by his father for a couple seconds, then saw a stick on the floor. He picked it up, and came back over to me. He started chattering about the stick and began whacking the tree near us.

After a little bit, his father told him to stop hitting the tree. The boy then said, "My father told me to stop hitting the tree."

"So you should probably stop, huh?"

"Yea."

It was the cutest thing ever.

For the next twenty-five minutes or so, the boy would do something and give me commentary about what he was doing. He'd run in circles and then come to me and lay down his strategy of how to run in circles, and what directions he used to go in the right direction. His father was on the phone the entire time, and every once in a while, he'd call his son over to him. The boy would go over, but after a couple seconds, he'd grow restless and drift back towards me. At one time, he came right up and shoved his little fingers in my face, which where red. He told me he had been painting, but he couldn't remember what.

It was so cute. When they left, he yelled, "Bye! See ya later!"

I love it when kids are so bold. Sometimes, its scary, which I'm sure the father feels sometimes, when the child goes up to complete strangers. You don't know who the person is and what they're like. But I know I'm not dangerous, so of course, I think it's totally cute that the boy had such a positively glowing personality.